Can ancient wisdom help us navigate the modern-day challenges of living with ADHD? Surprisingly, yes. Stoicism, a school of thought practiced by philosophers like Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, and Epictetus, focuses on cultivating inner resilience, staying grounded in the face of adversity, and emphasizing what we can control.
For people with ADHD, life can feel chaotic, overwhelming, and difficult to manage. However, Stoic principles can offer practical tools to help us build emotional resilience, manage anxiety, and focus on progress instead of perfection. Below are five timeless Stoic lessons and how they can help us with everyday ADHD challenges.
January 2025, Andrew Brawner, ADHD Coach @ Agave Health
1. “The soul becomes dyed with the color of its thoughts.” – Marcus Aurelius
We can’t control every thought that pops into our minds, but we can control how we respond to them. People with ADHD are often sensitive to negative feedback, which can undermine motivation. Instead of dwelling on negativity, try reframing those thoughts into something neutral or positive.
Key Takeaway:
Reframing negative thoughts helps us stay focused on progress rather than setbacks.
Example:
Negative Thought: “I failed my driver’s test. I’ll never be good at this.”
Reframe: “I’m still learning to drive, and each test helps me improve.”
2. “The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.” – Marcus Aurelius
Avoidance is a common ADHD habit—especially when a task feels uncomfortable or overwhelming. But avoidance often leads to feeling stuck. Instead, try asking yourself: What do I need to move forward? Identifying the first step can make the task less daunting.
Key Takeaway:
Growth happens when we face discomfort instead of avoiding it.
Example:
Challenge: “I’ve been putting off starting my exercise routine.”
Solution: Identify what will help you push through the discomfort. Do you need a workout buddy, a fun playlist, or a clear, simple plan to follow?
3. “Don’t waste time on what you can’t control.” – Marcus Aurelius
ADHD can make us feel overwhelmed by things outside our control, such as time constraints, other people’s expectations, or unpredictable changes. Stoicism reminds us to focus on what we can influence—our actions and reactions—and let go of what we can’t.
Key Takeaway:
When we focus on what’s within our control, we feel more grounded and less overwhelmed.
Example:
Challenge: “I need to finish my work, but I also have to go grocery shopping.”
Solution: Focus on what you can control right now. Can you set a timer to stay on task or delegate grocery shopping? Small steps restore a sense of control.
4. “We suffer more often in imagination than in reality.” – Seneca
Anxiety and overthinking often accompany ADHD, making us worry about situations that may never happen. This Stoic principle reminds us that our imagination can create unnecessary suffering. Instead of spiraling, bring your attention back to the present moment and focus on what you can control.
Key Takeaway:
Mindfulness helps us break the cycle of anxiety by grounding us in the present.
Example:
Scenario: You’re stuck in traffic, frustration rising, and you start ranting about other drivers.
Solution: Take a deep breath. Getting upset won’t change the situation. Use this moment to practice mindfulness and stay calm.
5. “It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.” – Epictetus
Life is full of unexpected events. With ADHD, we often feel setbacks more intensely, whether it’s rejection, failure, or last-minute changes. This Stoic principle teaches us that while we can’t always control what happens, we can control how we respond—and that’s what matters most.
Key Takeaway:
Focus on the process, not just the outcome. Resilience grows when we keep showing up, even after setbacks.
Example:
Scenario: You nailed a job interview, but later got a rejection email.
Solution: It’s okay to feel disappointed, but don’t let it define your worth. Reflect on what went well, ask for feedback, and keep moving forward. Each experience brings you closer to your goals.
Final Thoughts: Building a Resilient Mind
By applying Stoic principles, we can learn to reframe negative thoughts, face discomfort head-on, focus on what’s within our control, and reduce unnecessary anxiety. Life with ADHD doesn’t have to be chaotic—it can be an opportunity to grow, adapt, and thrive.
Quick Stoic Strategies for ADHD
Reframe negative self-talk: Turn “I can’t do this” into “I’m learning how to do this.”
Face discomfort: Ask, “What’s the first step I need to take?”
Focus on what’s within your control: Let go of what you can’t change.
Practice mindfulness: Bring your attention back to the present moment.
Your Turn
Try applying one of these Stoic principles today! Whether it’s reframing a negative thought or focusing on the next small action step, every bit of progress matters. We’d love to hear how Stoic strategies have helped you—share your experience in the comments!
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