Let’s talk about self-love and self-care for ADHD, but in a way that actually makes sense for our brains. Because let’s be real—when most people think of self-care, they picture long baths, spa days, or curling up with a book in perfect peace. But for those of us with ADHD, self-care can look completely different.
Self-care isn’t about aesthetics—it’s about function. It’s about giving your brain what it actually needs to thrive. So let’s break down self-love and self-care in a way that works with your ADHD, not against it.
February 2025, Rebecca Branham, ADHD Coach @ Agave Health
1. Self-Love Starts with Self-Understanding
Ever catch yourself thinking, “Why can’t I just do things like everyone else?” or “I should be more disciplined, organized, productive...”? ADHD brains work differently, and the first step to self-love is accepting that difference without judgment.
Shift the Narrative: Instead of, “Why am I like this?” try, “How can I make this work for me?”
Actionable Tip: Write down three things your ADHD brain does really well. Maybe it’s creative problem-solving, hyperfocus on things you love, or being the person who always makes people laugh. ADHD has strengths—recognize yours!
2. Redefine Self-Care for Your ADHD Brain
Self-care isn’t just pampering yourself; it’s setting up your life in a way that supports your needs. That could mean eating the right foods, getting enough sleep, or putting systems in place so you don’t feel like you’re constantly failing at “adulting.”
Think of self-care as a support system for Future You.
Self-Care That Actually Helps ADHDers:
Body-Doubling → Not just for work! Have a friend on video call while you fold laundry or clean your room. It makes the task feel easier. (pssst - we offer body-doubling inside the Agave Health app!)
Chunking Your Day → Instead of “I’ll do this later” (which we know doesn’t happen), schedule tasks in small, specific time blocks.
Prep for Low-Energy Days → Set up easy meals/snacks for days when cooking feels impossible. (Frozen meals? Protein bars? A plan to DoorDash something reasonable? All valid.)
Self-Regulation Breaks → 5-minute sensory resets like stretching, deep breathing, or listening to music can help when you’re overstimulated.
Actionable Tip: Pick one of these and try it today—don’t try to overhaul your whole routine at once! ADHD-friendly self-care is about small, sustainable changes.
3. Self-Love = Advocating for Your Needs (Without Guilt)
A huge part of self-love is not forcing yourself to function like a neurotypical person. This means asking for accommodations at work, explaining your needs to loved ones, or simply giving yourself permission to do things differently.
It’s not “making excuses.” It’s making adjustments that help you function better.
Drop the guilt around:
Using timers and alarms to stay on track
Saying no to things that drain your energy
Taking mental health days when you need them
Not forcing yourself into productivity methods that don’t work for your brain
Actionable Tip: Next time you catch yourself feeling guilty for needing support, reframe it: “I’m not being lazy, I’m using a strategy that works for my brain.”
Self-care is a Daily Practice, Not a Luxury
The biggest takeaway? Self-care for ADHD isn’t a “treat” you give yourself when you’re burnt out—it’s a daily practice that keeps you from reaching burnout in the first place.
At Agave Health, we know how important it is to set yourself up for success in ways that actually work for your brain. Whether it’s through coaching, therapy, or finding a community that gets you, self-care is about giving yourself what you need—without shame, without guilt, and without trying to fit into a system that wasn’t built for you.
So tell us—what’s one ADHD-friendly self-care practice you want to try this week? Drop it in the comments and let’s build better habits together! 💙
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